Sample Ceremony Readings
Why Marriage? By Mari Nichols
I Corinthians 13
[From] Gifts from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh
�A Friend�
The Color of My Love by David Foster and Arthur Janov
The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery
Because She Would Ask Me why I Loved Her by Christopher Brennan
�We Need One Another� by George E. Odell
Speak To Us of Love, from �The Prophet� by Kahlil Gibran
�I Will Be Here� by Steven Curtis Chapman
To My Friend
The Art of Marriage
On Marriage, From 'The Prophet' by Kahil Gibran
Why Marriage? By Mari Nichols
Because to the depths of me, I long to love one person,
With all my heart, my soul, my mind, my body�
Because I need a forever friend to trust with the intimacies of me,
With someone who thanks God for me,
With someone I feel blessed to hold�
Because marriage means opportunity
To grow in love in friendship�
Because marriage is a discipline
To be added to a list of achievements�
Because marriages do not fail, people fail
When they enter into marriage
Expecting another to make them whole �
Because, knowing this,
I promise myself to take full responsibility
For my spiritual, mental, and physical wholeness
I create me,
I take half of the responsibility for my marriage
Together we create our marriage�
Because with this understanding
The possibilities are limitless.
I Corinthians 13
A marriage ceremony represents one of life�s greatest commitments.
But it is also a declaration of love.
I wish to read to you what Paul wrote of love in a letter to the Corinthians.
I believe it is a true model of love and one I hope you pursue in your marriage.
Love is patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never boastful or proud.
Love is never haughty, selfish or rude.
Love does not demand its own way.
Love is not irritable or touchy.
Love does not hold grudges and will hardly notice when others do it wrong.
Love is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever truth wins out.
If you love someone, you�ll be loyal to them no matter what the cost.
You will always believe in them. Always expect the best in them and will always stand your ground in defending them.
[From] Gifts from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh
When you love someone, you do not love them all the time, in exactly the same way from moment to moment. It is an impossibility. It is even a lie to pretend to. Yet this is exactly what most of us demand. We have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life, of love, of relationships. We leap at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb. We are afraid it will never return. We insist on permanency, on duration, on continuity, when the only continuity possible in life, as in love, is growth, in fluidity, in freedom, in the sense that the dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in the same pattern.
The only real security is not owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting, not in hoping even. Security in a relationship lies neither in looking back on what it was in nostalgia, nor forward to what it might be in dread or anticipation, but in living in the present relationship and accepting it as it is now.
�A Friend�
A friend is someone you are comfortable with, someone who�s company you prefer. A friend is someone you can count on. A friend is someone who believes in you, someone with whom you can share your dreams. In fact, a real friend is a person you want to share all your life with.
When you are hurting, you can share your struggle with a friend; it eases the pain. A friend offers you safety and trust. A friend will laugh with you but not at you. A friend will pray with you and for you. A friend is someone with whom you can share your ideas and your philosophies, someone with whom you can grow. A friend senses our struggles and shares our lows as well as our highs. Friends do not always say we are right, because sometimes we are not. A lover and a friend, this is my true marriage partner.
The Color of My Love by David Foster and Arthur Janov
I�ll paint a sun to warm your heart
Knowing that we�ll never part.
I�ll draw the years all passing by
So much to learn, so much to try.
I�ll paint my mood in shadow blue,
Paint my soul to be with you.
I�ll sketch your lips in shaded tones,
Draw your mouth to my own.
I�ll trace a hand to wipe your tears
And trace a look to calm your fears.
A silhouette of dark and light
To hold each other oh so tight.
I�ll paint the stars in the evening sky
Draw the light into your eyes,
A touch of love, a touch of grace,
To softly fall on your moonlit face.
And with this ring our lives will start,
Let nothing keep our love apart.
I�ll take your hand to hold in mine,
And be together through all time.
The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery
(The little prince meets a fox�)
�Come and play with em,� the little prince proposed. �I�m feeling so sad.�
�I can�t play with you,� the fox said. �I am not tamed.�
�Ah! Excuse me,� said the little prince��What does tamed mean?�
�It�s something that has been too often neglected. It means, �to create ties�
�To create ties?�
�That�s right, the fox said. �For me you�re only a little boy just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you have no need of me, either. For you, I�m only a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me we�ll need each other. You�ll be the only boy in the world for me. I�ll be the only fox in the world for you.�
�I�ll make you the gift of a secret� said the fox��One sees clearly only with the heart. Anything essential is invisible to the eyes�It�s the time you spend on (something) that makes (it) so important�People have forgotten this truth, but you mustn�t forget it. You become responsible forever for what you�ve tamed.�
Because She Would Ask Me why I Loved Her by Christopher Brennan
If questioning could make us wise
no eyes would ever gaze in eyes;
if all our tale were told in speech
no mouths would wander each to each.
Were spirits free from mortal mesh
and love not bound in hearts of flesh
no aching breasts would yearn to meet
and find their ecstasy complete.
For who is there that loves and knows
the secret powers by which he grows?
Were knowledge all, what were our need
to thrill and faint and sweetly bleed?
Then seek not, sweet, the If and Why
I love you now until I die:
For I must love because I live
And life in me is what you give.
�We Need One Another� by George E. Odell
We need one another when we mourn and would be comforted.
We need one another when we are in trouble and afraid
We need one another when we are in despair, in temptation, and need to be recalled to our best selves again.
We need one another when we would accomplish some great purpose, and cannot do it alone
We need one another in the hour of success, when we look for someone to share our triumphs We need one another in the hour of defeat, when with encouragement we might endure, and stand again
We need one another when we come to die, and would have gentle hands prepare us for the journey
All of our lives we are in need, and others are in need of us.
Speak To Us of Love, from �The Prophet� by Kahlil Gibran
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself. Love possesses not nor would it be possessed; For love is sufficient unto love.
When you love you should not say, �God is in my heart,� but rather, �I am in the heart of God.� And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love�s ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise on your lips.
�I Will Be Here� by Steven Curtis Chapman
If in the morning when you awake
If the sun does not appear
I will be here
If in the dark we lose sight of love
Hold my hand and have no fear
I will be here
I will be here when you feel like being quiet
When you need to speak your mind I will listen
Through the winning, losing and trying we�ll be together
And I will be here
If in the morning when you wake
If the future is unclear
I will be here
As sure as seasons were made for change
Our lifetimes were made for years
I will be here
To My Friend
The Bride and Groom may dedicate this reading to one another.
It is called �To My Friend�
I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.
I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what your are making of me. I love you because you have done more than any creed could have done to make me good, and more than any fate could have done to make me happy. You have done it without a touch, without a word, without a sign. You have done it by being yourself. Perhaps that is what being a friend means, after all.
The Art of Marriage
Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created. In the art of marriage, the little things are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say, �I love you� at least once each day. It is cultivating flexibility, understanding, and a sense of humor. It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is standing together and facing the world. It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family. It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating your love for each other in many thoughtful ways. It is doing things for each other in the spirit of joy. It is having the capacity to forgive and forget. It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow. It is finding room for the things of the spirit. It is not only marrying the right partner; it is being the right partner.
On Marriage, From 'The Prophet' by Kahil Gibran
'You were born together, and together you shall be evermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your day. But let there be spaces in your togetherness
And let the winds of the heaven dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love. Let it be rather a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each others cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another your bread but eat not from the dame loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each
one of you be alone, even as the strings of the lute are alone. though they quiver with the same music.
And stand together, but not too near together, for the pillars of the temple stand apart and the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each others shadow'.